The Fan Stays Off

Seeds there

Virulent shoots hamper process

ingrates they throw everything into chaos,

disruptive and noisy I shout the same thought

weeding out the bad from the stillness.

Whispering calm directives – keep it cool, Emma –

but the thrashing divas hold the spotlight and won’t exit without a fight.


Timing is crucial.

Nobody can help bring order to the bothersome braying

that brutish tyrant who won’t allow others the time or space.

Patience is needed.

I am here

sometimes insistently so

but there is so much more to discover.


12 responses to “The Fan Stays Off

  1. Emma, it’s like you can paint a feeling that cannot be described, but using words instead of paints. Wonderful post. It says so much.

  2. “I shout the same thought weeding out the bad from the stillness.” I keep repeating this line over and over to myself. Sometimes, usually at night and when I’m tired my mind loops around and around often an anxiety or worry, but sometimes not – weeding out the bad from the stillness – that describes my mind during those times.

    And this, “but the thrashing divas hold the spotlight and won’t exit without a fight.” That beautifully describes my thoughts that get lodged somewhere. I love the image of “thrashing divas”.

    I think I told you once about when I was in graduate school and took a course on Virginia Woolf. We spent weeks on just one paragraph from her book – A Room of One’s Own. I loved that class, it remains my favorite to this day. That is how I feel reading your words.

  3. Poetry often confounds me creating want of the artist’s mindstate. Emma Artist: question – is this some of it please: Fan, seed, virulent shoot = shoot like seedling growth / wordplay / shoot like illness, like bullet = sound into head fan sound hurts? The fan, loud, like a diva? Ingrate = sound that grates / people who don’t appreciate the effort it takes to remain calm w/ all that disrupting noise inside and out? (Like my bathroom fan why oh why do they leave it on in my house turn it off fugoshsakenowIhavetogetupandgodownstairsanddoitforyoub/cyoudon’tgetit…??? Weeding out the bad from the stillness fan thumpstopthumpstopthump / wordplay / bad thoughts, anger, fear, freakout? Keep it cool = calm = cool of the fan yeah rock that wordstuff Emma very cool =). Thrashing Divas – your new rock band’s name?!!! (oh yeah so good) – the fan = thrashing and also = Diva in the sense that it holds the stage and maybe even has a light on it spotlighting it and you at the same time as you try to still the inside Diva parts that want to sing out in frustration? and also the others who will come to silence the frustrated? Timing – within yourself, the blades keeping time, the people outside finding the right time to come in, oh is this it? Rich imagery?!!! Who is braying? The fan / the voice inside / the multi parts inside including the cool one and the hot one and the voice that tumbles out unbidden? And the ones outside asking for calm?

    Are you really painting such imagery Artist Emma? My goodness. Is this some of it? Whew.

  4. Oh, Emma, I love you! My new word for the day: braying 🙂

  5. Emma, all of your words open doors and windows. The beginning of your poem, “Seeds there” gave me a that’s-it insight. The ending of your poem, “I am here sometimes insistently so”, provided me an ineffable sense of (of completeness I think). Your whole poem brought Albert Einstein to mind, in how he respected and spoke of ‘nature’; where he as have you would say “there is so much more to discover”. Your words do good work in our shared world.

  6. Love is All You Need

    The female Dylan Thomas.. brilliant ❤

  7. 1) you need to be published. This is very good.

    2) This is something that you both feel and see in the mind’s eye at the same time – as I read it the second time, I could see the seedlings sprouting,a tie to the palpable world as new life erupts in green needles.

    Then there is the bridge from the outside visible world to that which each of us carries about. It is as if that seed within is also erupting, and it too is showing itself as per an intuited rhyme and season.

    Over all this, the brooding sense of “we watch, waiting in expectation” runs like a clear cold – and most of all, wet – mountain stream.

    Ps: I needed to put ***wet*** in explicitly. I was describing what it felt like, and how it felt, also.

  8. This post of yours is so deep. I really agree with the person who says that you paint a picture with words. I think we all have those “thrashing divas,” but what a way to put it! I’ve read a lot of books in my lifetime, and only a select few compare to what you write. Seriously. This. Is. Awesome.

  9. I am a poet myself, and perhaps my clearest understanding comes from words that flow.
    Thank you for giving me sight; this is how it feels to be overwhelmed. I understand.
    You are a beautiful writer.
    Keep writing.
    Write with me.
    I hope one day I can fill the world in the same way you do.

  10. “sometimes insistently so”

    so much here resonates with me, but this, this is the phrase i will cherish. keep insisting, emma. thank you.

  11. Love your writing Emma, I take away so much from it!

  12. Emma, saw this and thought of what of you your writing conveys. .
    It strikes me that you are, like AE, mortgaged to the truth of the universe. That can yield challenge along the way of growing. It’s hard to be an individual only able to work with the truth of things. But when it all comes together, as it is already doing and will even more powerfully later, then we have someone unique, magnificent and wonderful.

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